My many years of working in law enforcement and corrections revealed that the holiday season is a difficult time for many, not just those behind bars.
These are just a few thought to consider:
Contact someone you know who is struggling –
We often don't know what to say or do when someone is in crisis. A simple greeting or a card/letter may bring someone the comfort they need for that moment.
We often don't know what to say or do when someone is in crisis. A simple greeting or a card/letter may bring someone the comfort they need for that moment.
Take action -
Run some errands, bring a meal, help with their children, write down special memories, or give them a special gift.
Run some errands, bring a meal, help with their children, write down special memories, or give them a special gift.
Remain consistent -
The people who initially show concern decreases over time. Continuing contact, especially during holidays and special occasions helps bring folks the encouragement, faith and hope they so often need during these times.
The people who initially show concern decreases over time. Continuing contact, especially during holidays and special occasions helps bring folks the encouragement, faith and hope they so often need during these times.
The open ear approach -
Many who try to help fall into the trap of only giving advice, or correcting the person’s thoughts and feelings. Be a listener and allow them to safely express their worries, frustration, anger, fear, sadness, etc. This helps them to feel secure and relaxed in your presence.
Many who try to help fall into the trap of only giving advice, or correcting the person’s thoughts and feelings. Be a listener and allow them to safely express their worries, frustration, anger, fear, sadness, etc. This helps them to feel secure and relaxed in your presence.
Be honest -
Many times those who are suffering, as well as their close family, become hyper-sensitive, so to speak. Be honest, they can ‘read’ you like a book. Seeing you twitch and squirm, though you feel as though you are hiding your awkwardness, telegraphs the fact that you don’t know what to do or say. Just be honest and remember … you only need to be there, you don’t need to say or do anything. The person is only seeking a few moments ‘away from it all’ to relax and be their old selves.
Many times those who are suffering, as well as their close family, become hyper-sensitive, so to speak. Be honest, they can ‘read’ you like a book. Seeing you twitch and squirm, though you feel as though you are hiding your awkwardness, telegraphs the fact that you don’t know what to do or say. Just be honest and remember … you only need to be there, you don’t need to say or do anything. The person is only seeking a few moments ‘away from it all’ to relax and be their old selves.
The best thing a friend said to me many years ago was simply, “Sometimes life just sucks!” He was honest, concerned, and above all, real.
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